In this episode of Voy a la Psico we talk about a very common confusion: self-compassion and victimhood are not the same. Compassion does not turn us into victims; it lets us stay with ourselves respectfully when something hurts, without getting stuck there.
We explore how pain can sometimes lead us to learned helplessness: feeling there is no way out, that “it does not depend on me”, and that our story ends up defining us. And we claim something essential: change is possible, above all when we change the way we talk to ourselves inside.
We also take apart a key myth: self-compassion is not self-indulgence. It is a brave way of being with pain without avoiding it, while creating the inner conditions to move forward. We share very concrete examples (such as how we would treat a child who makes a mistake) to understand why harshness blocks us and kindness regulates us and sets us in motion.
Drawing on Kristin Neff’s approach, we go over the three pillars of self-compassion: mindful presence with pain (neither exaggerating nor avoiding it), common humanity (you are not alone) and kindness towards yourself instead of judgement and self-punishment. We close with an invitation to value care, to create more humane environments and to turn complaint into responsibility: what do I do with this, what depends on me, and how can I support myself in a more nourishing and powerful way.
